Hair is always idealised to us as something which is a protective blanket. We typically hide behind it and also defines us as a person and with so much potential expression you can have with it it’s surprising that people aren’t more daring with their hair choices.
For a large part of my life I have had very long, medium/ light brown curly hair. After getting it cut at age 9 into a very short bob I decided to not cut it after that and it became suuuuuuuper long. I then relied on my hair as something which I could hide my face if I was upset or anxious as well as being proud of it, like a cape streaming out behind me all the time. This was until I reached the age of 17 when I wanted to have purple hair.
I had thought about dying my hair for a while but was very concerned about the damage it would cause as well as how expensive it would be considering the length and extreme thickness it was. In addition to this something that I have always wanted to do is donate my hair to a charity which could make wigs for people experiencing hair loss whether that was because of alopecia or cancer treatment. I wished to be able to do this because I know how much confidence hair brings to people and if I could help in some way I wanted to take full advantage of it. However, in order to donate your hair it must not have been previously bleached or dyed permanently. This led me to using semi-permanent purple box dyes which wouldn’t damage my hair, if I wanted to donate it, as well as washing out so I could test and see if I liked it. I really enjoyed my light purple, pink patchy brown hair for a couple weeks as it was something I wanted to try out for a while but came to the conclusion if I wanted to have a fully coloured head of hair then I would need to cut it off as it would have been way too expensive to do the whole lot as it was down to my bum and outrageously thick.
This allowed me to make the decision of when I would cut it and allowed enough time to also raise money along with the hair donation. I was scared for the chop because it felt like a piece of my femininity was being destroyed as well as my safety blanket being taken away. I had to remember what a good cause it was for and that I had the privilege and ability to grow it back if I wanted to.
The day came on the 1st September 2017 and the lady who cuts our hair, Nicki, was nervous. I was nervous. My mum was nervous. For something that seemed so menial was strangely impacting everyone which was a very interesting surveillance. We separated my hair off into 5 ponytails and once the first one came off the relief was gargantuan. I had a tear or two and my mum cried but it was so fascinating to see all my hair chopped off and lined up on the table. My head felt so light!! We had managed to cut off five 16 inch ponytails which was more than enough to make a full wig by the Little Princess Trust and in the end I also raised just over £360 for the same charity as the donation also funded the creation of one wig.
As soon as that hair came off I dyed it permanently and absolutely loved it! I no longer had boring brown hair and felt even more like myself which pushed me further with me creative outlook and appearance choices. My hair was curly and fresh feeling with a bright pop off colour. Since then I have been re dying it and cutting it shorter so despite going from extremely long hair to a bob it is odd to look at those photos and see that my hair was still just above shoulder length.
After a few months of cutting it shorter I decided I wanted another change: an undercut. So I got some clippers and my two close friends shaved the back of my head in the school toilets. It was exhilarating. I felt like such a bad ass with my grade 2 undercut and short purple bob just under my ears. I’ve learnt from being more daring with my hair that I no longer have a connection with it and somewhat have more confidence the less of it I have. A trap that people fall into believing is that dying your hair is going to harm it however I make sure that I wash it properly and don’t put heat on it too often. My hair is naturally curly and I like letting it air dry and keeping it natural so this hasn’t been a problem for me. I also get regular 6-8 weeks haircuts which means that my hair is maintained all healthy and soft.
I have only been to a hair salon once and that was when I wanted to have my hair dye professionally for my prom. After almost a year of colour build up I needed to go to a salon as I wanted to go bright blue on top and purple on the undercut. It was another great hair decision because I felt so cool and so different from everyone else and my friends and family seemed to love it too. Since then I have embraced the blue mop on my head and reached the point of wanting to shave all of it off but opted to first try out a fringe to see what it looked like (bit of a mistake because my hair is curly and I don’t have the patience or energy to straighten it each day). And since then again I have shaved the back and sides on grade 3 which I was OBSESSED with. I did it myself so it was all kinds of lengths but I can do still do so much stuff with it and felt so edgy.
It doesn’t take long these days before I want to change my hair up but I have now reached the point where I have shaved it off entirely and dyed it pink because, why not?! I do miss my long hair at times, the memories of swishing it around and feeling all the ringlets makes me want to weep a little but I know that I can always get back to it, or better still get a wig!! Shaving my head has certainly allowed me to not feel like I need my hair to define me or I can use it to hide behind. It is radical and spiky and weird but I love it.
The moral of this post is that it’s great to experiment with your looks and switch things up but also if you can contribute to society and donate money whilst doing it there’s an added bonus and more points to you winning at life!
